fat ass slip up.

i didn’t repeat moon bloodgood to myself last night after leaving my early screening of night at the museum 2.  i shoulda.  but i didn’t.  i stopped at the steak and shake.  why’s that place gotta be 24 hours?  for fat asses like me.  that’s why.

but oh well.  that happens.  i have made it to the gym three days in a row.  that’s an accomplishment.  and i’ve done pretty good on most of my meals.  my fruit smoothies and lots of cottage cheese and peaches.  i’m munching on some cottage cheese and mixed fruit right now.  yummy.  or course it’s not double cheese burger and cheese fries from steak and shake.  but it’s much less fat.

i did also have some chinese food yesterday.  but i figure that’s not so bad.  it’s mostly rice and veggies, right.  oh, and i did  have a fat mocha chai frozen yummy drink.  but that’s okay too.  so long as i don’t have them everyday and keep myself away from the steak and shake.

don’t be fat.

moon bloodgood, moon bloodgood

so yeah, she’s on the cover of this months maxim magazine.  and she makes me want to work out.  i just need to keep repeating her name to myself over and over as i ride on the exercise bike.  moon bloodgood, moon bloodgood.  she is out of this world.  dang.

so yesterday was a pretty good one for me.  and inspired by moon bloodgood i’m headed to the Y shortly.  gotta wait on the freaking TV guy to come fix the tube.

last night i was able to screen terminator salvation.  that’s what’s got me thinking about moon bloodgood.  that and her image on the cover of maxim.  at the movie some of my co-workers that also screened the film were eating some crap.  like taco bell and white castle crap.  and boy did it smell wonderful.  i really wanted some.  when the movie was over i drove right past steak and shake.  it’s 24 hours ya know.  and i really wanted to stop. 

but i didn’t.  i kept repeating moon bloodgood, moon bloodgood to myself.  and yeah, i’m shallow and vain and all that.  what of it?  i’m too pretty to be this fat.  and i really dig sexy thin women.  and if expect them to be sexy and thin, i reckon i oughta be too.  it’s all about confidence.  and when you look good and feel good.  it’s easy to be confident with yourself and that makes it easier to score sexy bitches like moon bloodgood.  that’s all i’m saying.

gonna have my full on breakfast again today.  with the eggs, ham and multigrain toast.  just so long as the gym comes calling.  then i’ll have a smoothie for lunch or maybe some grilled chicken and rice.  i do love chicken and rice.  it’s so yummy and it’s kinda good for ya.  beats the hell out of white castle.  mmm…white castle…

sorry.  moon bloodgood, moon bloodgood.

215.

what a freaking fat ass.  i busted my ass for like a year or so and went from 240 to 190.  i looked good.  i felt good.  and goll darnit, i was good.  but just like i always do, i gave up on myself and let myself start eating crap food.  i stopped going to the gym.  i ate late and fat.  i suck at life.

but alas, each day dawns the hope of a better one than the last.  today i woke up and fixed myself a kick ass breakfast.  fried some ham and eggs, toasted some multi grain bread, put some cheese on it with some miracle whip and went to town.  not exactly what you’d call a health nut breakfast but in my opinion and in the opinion of many experts i’ve read, breakfast is indeed the most important meal of the day.  might as well kick the day off right.  and i love eggs and ham.  so there ya go.

i did go to the gym today.  and since today is monday, it’s a good day to try and start some good habits over again.  i just played ball but it’s important just to get back in there.  baby steps, as i always say.

so i went and played some ball.  worked up a pretty good sweat and on the way home stopped at the local grocer and picked up some items to begin anew on my commitment to not be fat.  bought some strawberries, bananas, vanilla yogurt, cottage cheese and some peaches in a jar.  it cost me 15 bucks.  which ain’t bad considering i got enough to do me four or five meals.  and by meals i mean smoothies.

what i do is replace at least one meal a day with a smoothie.  strawberry and banana is my fav but you can do whatever you like.  pretty much any kind of berry is good mixed with any kind of fruit.  ain’t nobody ever got fat eating fruit.  except the tongans.  but they also eat whole pigs.

anyway, for lunch today i’m having a fruit smoothie.  it consist of ice, four or five strawberries, a banana, a couple spoonfuls of vanilla yogurt and a scoop of chocolate whey protien.  i already had the protien otherwise my grocery bill would have been double.  that stuff ain’t exactly cheap.  but it last a while.  i put all that stuff in a blender and bam!  a healthy meal replacement.  it’s delicious and filling.

for dinner tonight i’m thinking of some grilled chicken and rice.  or maybe just some cereal and yogurt.  but no fast food or soda pop and i’ll be off to a good start. 

215.  i’m too good looking to be this fat.

save me from myself

it’s so easy to fall back into bad habits as i’ve said before.  and it’s so easy to let those bad health decisions get you down and let them pull you down until you’re back living life in the unhealthy way that got you all fat in the first place.  and i’ve been living fat lately.  i’ve been depressed about some things in my life starting with they way i’ve been eating and not going to the gym.

then with some other stuff, i’ve just let myself go.  i’ve been eating fast food and drinking soda pops and eating candy bars and brownies.  today, i even finished off a thing of chocolate cake icing.  yeah, that’s right.  i been eating the icing just straight out of the container. 

i’m so fat.

but this whole healthy lifestyle thing i’ve been trying to do is a day to day thing.  every day i have to make the decision to be healthy.  the decision to not be fat.  and that decision needs to be made every day.

so today, i will not be fat.  i will not have fast food.  i will not eat candy.  i will go to the gym.

yeah, so.

i always like to say don’t be fat.  it’s a mindset.  not a diet, but an absolute change in lifestyle.  and that i believe.  but let me tell ya.  it’s real easy to live a lifestyle of fat.  and it’s real easy to fall back into that lifestyle.

i’ve packed on 16 pounds without doing anything.  not doing the anything is what gained me the 16 pounds. 

my gym routine is not routine.  and that’s what is killing me.  routines are important.  i’m so much better when i’m going to the gym on a regular basis.  i even floss.  flossing is part of my routine when i go to the gym. 

and it seems to me that it’s a lot harder to refrain from eating shit, as i call it, when you aren’t going to the gym.  when i go to the gym, i think more about what i eat.  if i go to the gym and get in a good work out, i’m less likely to stop at the wendy’s for a baconator combo than if i didn’t get a good work out in.  does that make sense?

routine, routine.

write it down.

alright, so i’m pretty pissed at myself for ballooning back up to over 200 pounds.  i had been holding fairly steady right at 200 but soemthing has happened in the past two weeks and i’m weighing in at 205 now.  that does not make me happy.

i’ve been lazy.  i’ve been over eating, eating out, eating fast food, drinking too much booze, too many soda pops.  i lost my focus.

i dropped fifty pounds from november of 06 to the summer of 07.  that’s pretty good considering i’m the laziest person i know.  i looked in the mirror one day and realized i didn’t like what i saw.  i became motivated and driven to lose weight.  and i did.

but like all good things in my life, i lost focus.  stopped doing all the things that helped me lose weight and started doing all the things that made me fat.

one thing that helped me lose weight and maintain a healthy diet was writing down everything that i ate.  today starts again the diet log.  so far today i’ve had one and half servings of whole wheat oatmeal with one whole banana and about five strawberries.  mmm…strawberries.  and for lunch i had one of those little plastic cups of mixed fruit and three big spoons of cottage cheese.  i love cottage cheese.  and also for lunch i had one can of creamy chicken noodle soup.

this will make it easier for me to have a healthy snack and healthy dinner.  i’ve been to the Y and i’ve documented my food intake so far, it’ll be easy to do the same for dinner.

there are several studies and articles you can find about how keeping a log of what you eat helps you lose weight and keep it off.  the most recent article i’ve seen on it was in Time Magazine.  a study was down with obese people.  those who kept a log of what they ate lost twice the weight as those that didn’t keep a log.

write it down.  works for personal finance as well…

no fast food today.

i’m tipping the scales at 200 again.  that pisses me off.  but i have been really lazy with the not going to the gym and eating fast food and drinking lots and all that.

but today i had no fast food at all, no soda pops, and no booze.  i did however eat out twice…had a sandwich wrap and a slice of pizza for lunch and a nathan’s chili cheese dog for dinner.  oh, and doughnuts and coffee for breakfast.  so i guess i ate out three times today…ay carumba.

still beats the hell out of fast food.  fast food kills, man.

i’m snacking on cottage cheese, peaches and a banana now.  so that’s good.  and i did make it to the gym today.  just did some cardio work.  the first step in getting back in the habit of going to the gym is to simply go to the gym.  just go and do something.  anything.  just go.

so i went and played ball with my nephew.  i kicked his ass.  i beat him four out of seven games.  the last one was pretty ragged for the both of us though.  playing ball for an hour or so works me harder than the same amount of time on the bike.  i guess i’m just trying harder when i’m playing ball.  i’m sure i could work myself that hard on the bike.  but whatever.

tomorrow dawns a new day and i do not intend on eating out or having any drinks.  i bought strawberries and bananas and yogurt for a breakfast smoothie and i’ve got cottage cheese for my morning snack.  i should have gotten something for lunch too, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

saved myself from mac donald’s double cheeseburgers.

i was off work late and tonight is band practice night.  so i gotta roll up to la grange as quickly as i can get there.  we usually start around five thirty and it’s already close to seven.  sometimes my guitarist wusses out and leaves early.  if he even makes it to practice in the first place.  we need a new guitarist, but that’s for another blog.

there’s a mac donald’s on the way and man, i’m really hungry.  didn’t have my two o’clock snack today and a dollar double cheeseburger sounds awesome right about now.

but i am strong.  i drive past the mac donald’s and just hope danny’s got something to snack on when i get to practice.

to very little surprise, practice has been cancelled.  but i do get there in time to share dinner with danny and melanie.  danny grills us up some chicken breast and his wonderful woman makes some corn and stovetop stuffing.  i love stovetop stuffing…

that’s hella better than a double cheeseburger at the mac donald’s.

but then i had to drive past that damned mac donald’s on my way back home.  the pull of the double cheeseburger was too great for me to resist this time around.  i suck.  i better get my fat ass up and go to the gym in the morning.

alright, here’s a tip for ya

quit your job.  if you ain’t gotta go to work, you got plenty of time to go to the ymca.  no excuses.

well, don’t quit your job.  unless you want to.  i didn’t quit my job, we just ain’t got no work this week.  and that sucks because i could really use the money.  but this does free up time where i can get back in the habit of going to the gym every day. 

and going to the gym makes it easier to eat right.  if you are just leaving the gym and it’s time for lunch, you ain’t gonna blow it all by going and getting fast food.  or you might.  but then you suck. 

so leaving the gym today, i stopped at the kroger and picked up fixin’s for lunch today and breakfast tomorrow.  lunch today was chicken stir fry.  and it was pretty good, actually.  i cubed some chicken and stir fried it in the wok for a few minutes then i dumped some frozen stir fry veggies on top of it.  mmm…stir fry.

i need a bigger wok though, i didn’t have room for the rice.  i fixed some wild rice and just had to put in all together when i ate it.  i also put some of those kick ass crushed oriental peppers in mine.  just to kick it up a bit.

had doughnuts for breakfast.  that’s not so good.  but it’s not fast food and i did go to they Y.  breakfast tomorrow will be a strawberry smoothie.  strawberries were on sale today.  two things for five bucks.  that’s not too bad.  should last most of the week.

dinner tonight has yet to be eaten but i’m not going fast food, i can tell ya that.  i’m probably going to patronize this local bar that’s about to go out of business because no one eats there.  so i’ll try and do my part.

getting ready to munch down on my afternoon snack of cottage cheese and peaches.  i love cottage cheese and peaches.

bad habits

come back like a rash you just can’t shake.

i’ve had a bad couple of weeks.  too much fast food to start.  not near enough time at the gym for second.  too much galavanting for third.

but i’m feeling much better now.

i remember back when i decided that i was going to live a healthier lifestyle and therefore changing my bad eating habits for good eating habits, the first thing i did was eat a good breakfast everyday.  that breakfast included bacon and eggs and wheat toast and tomatoes.

that’s a breakfast i think i could have for the rest of my life and die happy.  fat and happy.  but it’s better than a fast food breakfast any day of the week.  and dammit, i love bacon, eggs, wheat toast and tomatoes.  and part of motivating myself to get up earlier enough to prepare my breakfast and also pack lunch was the bacon and eggs.  i figure i’ll get up for bacon.

and then once i developed the habit of getting up and fixing breakfast, i turned towards weight loss objective and switched to fruit smoothies.

i’m doing the bacon and eggs again just to get back in the habit of preparing my own breakfast and therefore i’m up early enough to pack lunch.  which a packed lunch is a million times better than fast food.  anything is better than fast food.

i got an idea for another dbf t-shirt.  it says fast food kills.  because it does.

actually went to the Y the other day.  that makes once this week.  talk about a habit that’s easy to lose. 

this one is harder than the diet i think.  they go hand in hand really and if you can do one, your mind is always on the other.  kind of like brushing your teeth and flossing.  you should just automatically do the two of those things together.  but i’m like everybody else.  i sometimes don’t floss.

i sometimes don’t go to the gym.  i sometimes eat the wrong stuff. 

i sometimes fall back into bad habits of never going to the gym and always eating the wrong stuff.

it happens.