don’t be fat. rededicated.

Today was a pretty good day.  Yesterday I decided to get off my ass and lose those twenty five more pounds to put me down at 180.  Since dropping down to 189 at the middle of last summer, I fell back into my fatness.  And picked up 16 pounds to put me at my current 205.  And that’s just too fat.

 

That and I figure I’m 33 years old.  I’ve wasted half of my productive life already.  So I reckon I got some making up to do.  And if I don’t get into shape pretty quickly, shit’s gonna start going south.  Fast.

 

So let’s see, a pop tart for breakfast.  Which really ain’t that good for ya, but it beat the hell out of McDonald’s.  Had some OJ also.  Snacked on some cheese crackers and trail mix.  Had ham and cheese sandwich on wheat for lunch with some Funyuns.  Those are pretty bad for ya, but they are so tasty.  And I’ve been eating Wendy’s for lunch a lot.  There’s one pretty close to where we’ve been working so anything today was a step in the right direction.

 

For dinner I had a cheese burger from my grill, peas from a can, and left over corn on the cob from the grill last night.

 

I really try to limit my carbs to breakfast and lunch but like I said, anything beats fast food.  Fast food kills.

 

Did 30 minutes on the bike and played a couple games of five on five basketball at the Y with a bunch of kids way younger than me.  But it’s a good workout.

the contest.

The contest.

 

A friend today got me thinking about Seinfeld.  I never planned my Thursdays around watching it but I would have to say that through re-runs and DVDs I’ve seen most of the series.  They did some really funny stuff on there.

 

One of the best episodes, some would say the best episode, was called the Contest.  Each of the four main characters have a contest to see who can go the longest without sex or masturbation.

 

Kramer is out before the first day has gone bye.  There’s a woman in the building across the street from his window that walks around her apartment naked.  It’s really funny as you see Kramer burst stumbling into Jerry’s apartment and slap his money down on the table.

 

But I was thinking about this particular episode today I decided to have a contest with myself.  No, not like that you perv. 

 

It’s a modified version of the contest from Seinfeld.  In this contest, I challenge myself to go without sex or masturbation until I weigh 180 pounds.  So it’s more of a challenge than a contest.

 

Unless someone else joins.  But I’m not sure how that would work.  There’d have to be some stakes.  Something other than a reward to myself.  I suppose the proper challenger, or entrant into my challenge, could make things very interesting…

 

I could make it really interesting on my own.  If I don’t achieve my target weight by a certain date I have to have sex with a fat chick.

 

But that’s probably what’s gonna happen anyway though.

 

I got down to 189.  Then I got lazy.  Went on vacation, got out of the routine and just never have gotten back into it.

 

So I know what I gotta do.  I gotta take my fat ass to the gym every freaking day.  Or five times a week minimum.  I gotta realign my diet with the ideology of nutrition that helped me lose all that weight in the first place.

 

Starts with no carbonated beverages.  And is followed quickly with no fast food.

 

I’m usually not good at stuff like this.  Ya know, setting goals and making them.  However I feel somewhat renewed as of late.  I feel I’m going to need all my Jedi skills in the coming months and phase one of Jedi training is preparing yourself physically.

 

Who’s with me?

 

I’m gonna say I’m at 205 as I sit my fat ass here in front of the computer instead of in the gym shooting hoops….

 

So from 205 to 180, that’s 25 pounds unless my math is wrong.  And it a lot of times is.  Ask the little girl at the bank that processes my overdrafts.

 

How long did it take me to lose 50 when I went from 240 to 189?  From November 06 to July 07.  Eight months, right?  Once again, not so good with the math thing.

 

It would stand to reason that I should be able to lose 25 pounds in four months.  That’s probably not right though.  When you’re a big fat ass like I was at 240, the first twenty or so is easy to come off.  If you don’t eat crap for you food and start a regular workout routine, you drop those first few pounds quick.  It’s the last few that are so hard.

 

So let’s say six months.  Check my math, but that puts me in the December range.  Now, to make my story really, really good I’m going to meet a girl very soon.  A smokin’ hot girl who for some reason wants to bed me.

 

But I stay true.  I tell her about my plight to better myself all the way around starting with my body. 

 

Naturally we fall in love, go through some trials, get things together and have sex on our wedding night six months from now or so on New Year’s Eve. 

 

That would be perfect.  Plus we’ve got a reason to skip out on family every year at Christmas to celebrate our anniversary.  YES!!!

 

I’ll keep ya posted on all that.

so i was pretty much a fat ass yesterday.

So I was pretty much a fat ass today.  I started out good with vanilla yogurt and those new kick ass cheerio’s crunch for breakfast.  But then we were on the job site and no one packed any lunch. 

 

Wendy’s here we come.  Had cheeseburger, fries and a coke.  That’s the first carbonated soda I’ve had since I was in Winchester this weekend.  I always have an ale-8 when I’m there.  That’s just the way it is.

 

Dinner wasn’t too much better than my lunch.  Didn’t eat out.  I fixed three hot dogs on the grill.  Two pieces of bread and a handful of Grippo’s bbq chips.  Mmm…Grippo’s bbq chips….

 

That really wasn’t so bad.  Other than the bread.  I try to eat carbs early and not so much late.  But sometimes it happens. 

 

If I would have stopped there I’d a been okay.  But I felt the need for some mac and cheese.  I love mac and cheese.  I love it.  So I downed just over half a box of Velveeta shells and cheese.  And it was good.

 

But no, I didn’t stop there. 

 

I went to the Barnes and noble to just browse around a bit.  And have a chai mocha frappacino.  Cream based of course.  And I figured since I was being fat today I might as well get one of their detectible double chocolate cupcakes.  And it was good too.

 

Oh well.  Everyday is a new day and you just have to try to don’t be fat each and every day.  Some days you will do better than others.  You just have to be not fat more than you are fat.  Eventually good habits will take over.

 

And it’s okay to treat yourself on occasion.  Just not everyday.

best work out in months.

I hade about the best work out I’ve had in months tonight getting my ass beat at basketball by some punk ass teenager.

 

Kid killed me.  24-10 and then 24-15.  Dude, my feet hurt.  I might have to upgrade my 15 dollar Starbury’s for some better sneakers.  Because surely it’s not my old, tired feet.

 

I wasn’t even gonna play ball tonight.  I was gonna shoot around for a minute then ride the bike.  More like I’m gonna try and give myself a heart attack trying to beat punk asses at the Y.  Please know that these punk asses included my nephew whom is one of my best friends.  So it’s a good group of guys, mostly younger but we had a dude older than me out there too, but it’s mostly teens.  My reference to them as punk asses is meant in a light hearted ribbing kind of way.

 

Like when Dave Chappell says, “Peace, bitches.”

 

Kid’s name is Jacob Jenkins.  http://wisconsin.scout.com/a.z?s=193&p=8&c=1&nid=2873791

 

I’m hoping the Wildcats or even Louisville, or Xavier or anyone local gets interested.  That would be cool.  I could watch him on TV and brag about how he used to kick my ass at the Y.

 

He did let me just go past him a couple times.  It really could have been worse.  If I could of bought a 3 ball that might have helped.

 

I’m back under 200 lbs, bitches.  Need to stay there the rest of my life. 

 

Been trying to avoid the fast food.  Fast food kills, man.  McDonald’s is like cocaine.  You just want it.  And after you have it, you just want more of it.

 

I think I only had fast food twice this week if you count Sunday.  Sunday I had White Castle on the way down to the White Brother Funk recording session.  Then a little later I piled some Chinese buffet on it.  And I know I could eat as much as I wanted ‘cause it was all coming out shortly.

 

It’s like the White Castles cause a reaction in my stomach.  Everything I eat after White Castles turns into some kind of almost liquid sludge in my intestines.  And as soon as the pressure on the anus builds to that point, everything just simply falls out the bottom.

 

It’s really kind of disgusting.

 

That is it actually.  Now I think about it.  That’s all the fast food I’ve had all week.  So that’s good.  I do try to avoid it.  But man, sometimes you just gotta have that fix.

 

The longer you go with out the easier it gets. 

late night snacks.

Don’t be fat.

 

Here’s a good late night snack.  ‘Cause sometimes late night snacks are good.

 

Honeynut Cheerio’s, vanilla yogurt and strawberries.  Mmm…strawberries.  I also like bananas but you can go with either or both.

 

I like fresh strawberries but the frozen ones are just as good when they are thawed.  I also use frozen strawberries and other frozen fruits in my morning smoothies.